Track 10 of Future Ghosts, and probably my favourite on the album.

 

 

epiphany come

epiphany go

i slap them

against the window

 

see which crack first

glass or dream

see how solid

each render reckons itself

 

-

 

by avebury stone

i drink myself blank

strand of all season

bleeding through

for solstice sun

for ancestor stain

for history come

i drink

 

-

 

sink your bone

your mother memory

ether go away

or go all the way

 

bring the sun

miss speed miss delic

second of no

still of yes in motion

 

-

 

it's only

human pain

it's just

the stink of love

 

cygnusolar

stolen sun

shine

motherfucker shine

 

Musically this draws heavily on the Logos track db00215, an out-take from the Shamania sessions which appears on the Logos 'unreleased tracks' collection Chasing A Thread That Has No End. You can hear that version here.

 

The text was written 20-22 June 2014, in Avebury, Wiltshire. I usually spend the solstice period in Avebury, and on this occasion was staying with my good friend Steve Marshall, whose book about Avebury and its history will be published this spring; I'll no doubt post some links to it closer to the time, for those of you who are interested in that sort of thing (as I am).

 

Some comments on the text:-

 

"epiphany come / epiphany go / i slap them / against the window / see which crack first / glass or dream / see how solid / each render reckons itself" - When you've been in the epiphany game as long as I have, you learn to test any new arrival before embracing it. Reminds me of my time on the occult scene in the 1990s; however successful you think your demonic or angelic summoning, and however much belief or reality or paradigm shift you invest in it, treat anything that subsequently occurs or manifests with extreme suspicion until it adequately verifies itself.

 

"by avebury stone / i drink myself blank / strand of all season / bleeding through / for solstice sun / for ancestor stain / for history come / i drink" - This was indeed written at Avebury stone circle on the summer solstice, 21 June 2014, in the midst of what McKenna may have shaken his head at and disparagingly termed a 'heroic dose' of alcohol, and also in the midst of mental collapse; the second, and longest, of my breakdowns that year. Yes, I know alcohol and depression is not a recommended combination; nor, for that matter, is alcohol and anti-depressant medication.

 

"either go away / or go all the way" - See the Jefferson Airplane track Hey Frederick (Volunteers album, 1969)

 

"bring the sun" - See the track Bring The Sun by Swans, from their 2014 album To Be Kind. I was listening to this album a great deal at the time.

 

"miss speed miss delic" - In both their literal senses and in their pharmaceutical connotations.

 

"it's only / human pain / it's just / the stink of love" - See the Swans track A Little God In My Hands (To Be Kind album, 2014; see also note above): 'Oh universe you stink of love'.

 

"cygnusolar / stolen sun / shine /motherfucker shine" - Aside from the “by Avebury stone” section (which, as noted above, was indeed written by Avebury stone), the whole of the Cygnusolar text was written while sat in the garden of my friend Steve Marshall's house in Yatesbury, Wiltshire*, at the onset of a mental breakdown, listening to much Swans and hefty 60s psych. Sometimes madness is necessity, the only feasible response to the circumstances in which one finds one's mind. Fields budding and fecund in every direction, mama sun beating. I need to ditch my accessories; cigarette in left hand, beer can in right, screen before me and headphones in my ears. At one point I imagined a perfect experience of communion with the ineffable, an ascended moment that would be immaculately complemented by these things. I was wrong. We don't get where we should be by acquiring, by adding to what we currently are; we get there by stripping away.

 

* = It was also in Steve's house and garden (and in the Red Lion, Avebury) that I mixed the Future Ghosts album exactly a year later, over a long weekend at summer solstice 2015.

 

Currently reading: The Holocaust - Martin Gilbert

Currently listening: Unknown Pleasures - Joy Division (one of my favourite ever albums, though for purely personal reasons Closer still has the edge for me as best Joy Division album)

Returning to my track-by-track of Future Ghosts; Her Is All.

 

 

her mass

her spin

her point

her pull

her burn

her fuse

her spike

her light

her arc

her surge

her tide

her turn

is all

 

her blood

her salt

her cell

her bone

her wave

her word

her grain

her set

her swoon

her breath

her rain

her thorn

is all

 

her glass

her rust

her dust

her chrome

her tower

down

her smoke

her steel

her gloss

her click

her now

her tight

is all

 

her ghost

her drift

her fossil

wild

her faery

fade

her grievous

light

her meat

her fold

her dear

remains

is all

 

This text dates from March 2014, and largely explains itself. Several lines from the last section borrow from the art of Heather Baker / intextremis - http://inextremiss.deviantart.com/. I've been a fan of her work for a while and its often been a source of inspiration.

 

Currently reading: Berlin The Downfall 1945 - Antony Beevor

Currently listening: Peepshow - Siouxsie & The Banshees

The first of the new projects mentioned in my January post Memories Of Tomorrow is now available. The Logos album Chasing A Thread That Has No End collects tracks that were created during the sessions for our previous albums but didn't find a home on those for one reason or another. All tracks have been reworked to a greater or lesser degree for this release.

 

Dark Skies Now was created early in the sessions for the as yet unreleased fifth Logos album proper, At The Core Of Each Star. db00215, Angel Hair, and Anhedoniac are out-takes from the album Shamania. Elements of these tracks were used on my spoken word with music album Future Ghosts, in the tracks Cygnusolar, At The Speed Of Film, and 4581 Asclepius respectively. Red Book Yellow Book is a very early Logos track, created at the same time as the music which later made up the albums Gehenna Now and Ascending A Line In The Sky To Sothis. This track was originally named The Owls Are Not What They Seem, though we changed it for this release as that phrase has since become much-overused internet-wide. it is, of course, from Twin Peaks. Manunkind and The Looming Tower are out-takes from our album Gehenna Now. A rather different version of Manunkind can be found on the Logos remix album Everything Under The Sky. Voice here is by me, reading a text by E E Cummings.

 

It is perhaps worth noting that we had over four hours of unreleased Logos music to choose from when compiling this album; for this reason we'll likely do a second volume at some future point.

 

 

Currently reading: Doctor Sleep - Stephen King

Currently listening: The Cloud Doctrine - Angus MacLise

As mentioned in my last post, my next spoken word album will be Left At The Luna Mansion. Here's the current track listing though this will likely change, at least in sequence.

 

Ra Hide Away

A Pocketful Of Bullets

Bass Strings

White Noiz

Coelacanth

Buddha's Mistake

The Books I Haven't Read

Klaxons

Signifying Mother

The Ten Thousand Ontological Uses Of The Word "Fuck"

Hometime

Save Before You Quit

You Cannot Wait While In The Air

Hard Target

Bone Thing

Rebis

West Ramona Spiders

Here To Here

Sandman

Heavy Peace

 

Yes that is 20 tracks, though most are very short. None span more than two and a half minutes, and some are half that or less. All texts were written between 2005 and 2008. At the time I was living in Aylesbury, Buckinghamshire with my now ex-wife, drinking what I might charitably describe as "heroic" amounts of booze and wrestling with all manner of matters ontological and eschatological. I believe the term is 'functioning alcoholic'. Alcohol is definitely a theme here; alchohol, and quiet desperation in middle-age middle England. 

 

Voice is already recorded, and I'm currently creating the backing. Musically this album is simpler and sparser than my previous ones and I'm even toying with the idea of some tracks featuring only voice. My Memories Of Tomorrow blog post included four pieces already finished; I'll post some more anon.

Why the title? Aforementioned ex-wife made a custom mix CD which we'd frequently listen to during the period these texts were written, and which she named Left At The Luna Mansion. I've wanted to use it for an album for a long time. Much as I liked it, though, I never did ask her why or what it meant to her.

 

Currently reading: The End: Berlin 1944-1945 - Ian Kershaw

Currently listening: The Velvet Underground - The Velvet Underground

I have a number of projects ongoing right now; some of these will release in the coming months, some will likely take longer.

 

 

Left At The Luna Mansion

Spoken word with music album. All texts written 2006-2008. I'll be making a separate and more substantive post regarding this album very shortly. In the meantime, here are some sample tracks:-

 

 

 

 

 

 

All Things Left On Earth

Spoken word with music album. I’ve mentioned this one in previous blog entries; its content has changed somewhat since then, with some tracks now appearing on Left At The Luna Mansion. All Things Left On Earth will instead focus on most recent writing, 2009-2015. Here are some sample tracks:-

 

 

 

 

Belong

Novel. I've mentioned this book a couple of times before on this site. Various sections have been previously published; see this page for details. This year will finally see the release of the full length text.

 

 

Cutting

Novel. As above, a number of extracts from this book have been previously published; again, details here.

 

 

Untitled new novel

Written 2013-2015. Currently at second draft stage. It’ll be finished when it’s finished.

 

 

Hate Ashbury

Spoken word with music album. As some of you will know, this was intended as the follow-up to God Thing, but those recording sessions – way back in 2010! - mutated in a very different direction and became the first Logos album, Gehenna Now. Ever since, I’ve intended to return to it and finish it for release. I'll post some sample tracks nearer to the time, as and when I've finished mixing them. 

 

 

What We Were

A collection of shorter writing, 2004-2015, including the full texts of all my spoken word albums. The title is provisional.

 

 

At The Core Of Each Star

New Logos album, currently in progress. Some sample tracks:-

 

 

 

 

Untitled Logos album

A collection of unreleased tracks, 2010-2014. We’re still sifting through and deciding which to include. There are several hours’ worth to choose from. That said, we’ve already got a pretty good idea of what the final track listing will be. Here's one of them:-

 

 

 

We’ll also likely do a Logos compilation for free download, featuring selected tracks from all our albums so far. Santa Susana Blues (and the subsequent mix album Everything Under The Sky) seemed to mark the end of one stage of Logos; At The Core Of Each Star definitely takes us in a different direction and it seems apt to collect a “favourite tracks” album at this point. I’ll also do a compilation of favoured spoken word with music tracks, intended as a sampler / introduction to my work for those uninitiated.

 

It is of course also very possible that other projects may sneak in under the wire; Future Ghosts, for example, released in July 2015 but even I didn’t know about it until May 2015. Keep an eye on this blog and my Facebook and Twitter feeds for further information and updates.

 

Currently reading: Hitler & The Holocaust - Robert S Westrich

Currently listening: Black Mountain - Black Mountain

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